Tag Archives: disconnect

Re-Set Button

By Denise Daub

Every year during the spring and summer I spend time at our camp by the lake.  I think of my time up there as my “re-set”, the place I go to think, reflect, relax, catch up on my reading and most of all disconnect.  There is no internet and no TV, there isn’t much to do but take walks and kayak.  Unfortunately, it is far enough away that I can only visit a few times a year and only in the warmer weather so I only get to “re-set” a couple of times of year.

I have been thinking about that.. disconnecting only a few times a year… I don’t think that is enough… do you?

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How many times a year, month or week do you disconnect?  Do you ever disconnect?  Just about everyone has a cell phone today and you can always be reached.  Everyone has a computer and we now get news 24 hours a day.  Social media has replaced letters and conversation and we now know what all our friends and family are doing every second of the day.

I decided that I am not waiting until May to hit my next re-set button… I am going to shoot for one a month.  I know that is really not enough… but I need to start somewhere.  I know I have to do something different because by the time May rolls around, I am burned out.

How about you?  When are you going to hit your re-set button?

Crisis: Danger and Opportunity Combined

By:  Maria E Trujillo alias Manual DeVie

Suddenly normal events took on pain, awkwardness and new meaning.

I ran into someone I hadn’t seen for awhile and she asked, “How are your kids?”

I shared that my son is now incarcerated for four years.

This is followed by a brief and awkward pause from us both. She then said, “That’s too bad” and we quickly disconnect.

So often these awkward moments equaled disconnection.

crisisWhen I first heard my son was going away to prison and for how long I was speechless, overwhelmed and frightened. Only I couldn’t just walk away and disconnect from this new reality, this crisis. My mental health and happiness suddenly vanished.

I now realize that this has been a blessing and opportunity in disguise. Resources and prevention programs for a prescription pill epidemic are lagging behind the need. Our journey had actually begun twelve years before the incarceration. Being locked up was the best chance my son had of getting the drugs out of his system.

If I had turned my thoughts or concerns about what others thought, fearing their judgment of me as a mother, my worry, upset and concern about my son and his present situation would have been compounded. It could have become a downward spiral. I might I have turned to a doctor asking for pills to help me sleep? I can easily imagine that I might have fallen into a similar trap as my son, relying on medication to help me with my mental and emotional anguish.

Luckily I am so grateful for the training I had in choice theory psychology. Knowing ways I could improve my own mental health and happiness helped me manage myself. I also learned tangible actions to help my son.

Choice theory psychology was everything I wished I had known when I was a kid. It was everything I wanted my children to learn. For me “necessity was the mother of my invention!” I created Manual DeVie to teach our youth choice theory psychology. I was able to use my hindsight into foresight for our kids.

I learned one last surprise from this crisis. Now when people hear my son is incarcerated I am able to use this opportunity to share.

I AM SO PROUD OF MY SON!