By Dr. Ken Larsen
“Full many a flower is born to blush unseen, and waste its sweetness on the desert air.”
Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard by Thomas Gray 1751.
For me this verse struck me with sadness from the very first time I heard it. As life has unfolded I see evidence of the many unseen flowers trapped in the loneliness of our culture.
We all know those who are lonely, most of us have been there ourselves. When I’m in that place I find mental health and happiness more elusive.
I think the holiday season afflicts many of us as we look to the fabricated images of people enjoying the holiday season and then realizing that our own lives don’t often match those fabrications.
I recently had some major surgery and was feeling lonely and a bit sad because of the forced inactivity of recovery. Then the phone rang. It was a call from a friend who is a media personality in her part of the world. What touched me and actually sent a jolt of joy through me is that she took the time to call and tell me she was thinking of me. This simple act of friendship and kindness changed the color of my day from blue to rosy red.
A call, a note, a smile, a friendly touch are all very welcome to us when we are feeling unseen and out of touch. Let’s reach out and brighten the day of someone we know or someone we don’t know to give them the boost they may need to reconnect with their mental health and happiness.
By Dr. Nancy Buck
Another romance ended. I was sad and lonely . . . again. I missed my guy. Unfortunately he was no longer my guy.
I had given him my newly mended heart. He told me he wanted his freedom more than he loved me. At least he had been honest and upfront. Still it was a sad and lonely time.
Since I was spending a lot more time alone I had more time to lick my wounds and think. I replayed all the fun we had enjoyed, trips we had taken, moments of quiet, shared joy. I would never have those times again. Yes, I would miss this fellow and I would miss all of these fun times.
Maybe I wouldn’t take these trips and enjoy the same fun with the same guy. But why was I writing off the possibility that I wouldn’t have fun again?
After spending enough quiet contemplation alone I realized that a BIG part of what I was sorry to lose was the me that I was when I was with this man.
Everything shifted. I needed to learn how to be that same me with having him in the equation!
Fabulous! Glad I met him. Glad we had our relationship. And even more glad that he introduced me to the best of myself!